Julie Guest Direct Response Copywriter, Marketing Strategist, Best Selling Author

Tired of boring on-hold messages? Try this one...:)

Thank you for calling. All of our associates are currently busy assisting other customers. But your call is very important to us. So have no worries, we'll get to it shortly. In the mean time, unlike most companies who try to lull you with boring music or force you to endure endless sales messages, we'd like to occupy your time more effectively. So while you are waiting to speak to us, we hope you enjoy our version of being on-hold. If you're like most of us, this week you've spent around 7 hours of your time sitting in traffic.

Just so you know, we don't want to waste any more of your valuable time. We'll get to you call very soon. No need to honk. Thanks for calling us.

A real life in-person person will be with your shortly. Well I'm live, of course, but I'm not here right now. I recorded this earlier. And due to the fact that so many of people enjoy our excellent services, you may have to wait for a few. Sorry for that, but it's worth the wait.

For now, just sit back and I'll keep you company. It has been proven that the average person falls asleep in about seven minutes. Relax, we don't expect you to fall asleep on us. We'll answer your call much sooner than that. In the mean time, we hope you didn't think this message was a snore.

Did you know you have to wait two full months for your hair to grow half an inch? So if you were thinking your new 'do would grow out while on hold, you're mistaken, we'll get to your call much sooner than that, and by the way we love what you've done with your hair. Life goes by too fast. Don't you agree? So we thought you would appreciate if we slowed things down and put life on hold for a minute.... There, now isn't that much better? But don't worry. We won't slow things down too much. We'll be with you in just a moment.